Instead, the options are:
‘Fake It Till You Are So Ill You Can’t Get Out Of Bed’
‘Fake It Till You Have A Flare’
‘Fake It Till You Have A Flare, Continue To Fake It Till You’re Hospitalised‘
‘Accept That You Have One Or More Chronic Illnesses, Adapt Accordingly And Look After Yourself’
This is really important. I grew up believing I had to just use mind over matter to power past my symptoms, and that eventually led to a complete mental and physical breakdown that left me unable to walk on my own for a month. We really need to get rid of the idea that people aren’t trying hard enough if they don’t push themselves to the breaking point. It can be really harmful to pretend you’re okay when you’re not, especially if you’re struggling with chronic illnesses. It’s okay to accept that you have limitations and set boundaries so you’re not hurting yourself trying to keep up with able-bodied people.
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My emotions are valid*
*valid does not mean healthy, or good, or to be privileged above common sense and kindness
A distinction for anyone who is young and hasn’t figured this out yet:
You are allowed to have whatever emotions you want. No one can control your emotions. Emotions are healthy responses to things.
You are not allowed to have behaviors that are harmful just because you have certain emotions. Your behaviors are what you can control, and they are far easier to control than your emotions.
You can be jealous about someone or their talents until you turn green, but it is harmful to yourself and to that person if you try to sabotage them because of it. You can be so angry you can literally feel your temperature rise, but this does not give you permission to rage at others.
Your emotions are valid. They are always valid. You are a person of value. However, you behaviors are not always justified just because of those emotions. You may not be able to control you emotions, but you can certainly control your behaviors.
“You may not be able to control your emotions, but you can certainly control your behaviors.”
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